Episode 095

                "Darkness,
                Imprisoning me,
                All that I see,
                Absolute horror.
                I can not live.
                I can not die.
                Trapped in myself.
                Body my holding cell!"
                                Metallica, One

 

                "In the darkness, everything comes back."

                "In the darkness, all the old tales of childhood return. In the darkness, the boogey man is real. In the darkness, all your fears are real. Once more, the darkness becomes your foe. Instantly, the darkness returns to the powerful state it once was. Long ago, people learned to fear darkness. But the modern era lost it's respect for the age-old foe of the children of the sun."

                "But when the darkness sweeps back in, the memories within the soul, no matter how far displaced, by however many countless generations, suddenly remember all too vividly the justifiable fear of the darkness."

 

                The words echoed in Aaron's mind. They came to him constantly, the rememberance of the darkness and the warning he had once given in a bright, crowded auditorium. His psychology masters had depended on that presentation.

                But now, the darkness was not a hypothetical realm of psychological debate. Now, the darkness was real. Real and right before him. Now, that proverbial darkness was evident no matter where he looked, what he said, what he did, how he wished, or any other act of a desperate man.

                Now, Aaron was trapped in the darkness that he had learned long ago to fear.

 

                The university walk ways were bright and sunny.

                Alan was not.

                A late-night hang-over lingered in the college guitarist's mind as he stumbled down through the isolated brick walkways that formed the veins of the university. He held his head, trying to fight off the pain of the world, but it kept coming back, more and more potent.

                Unable to fight any more, Alan stepped over to the side of the brick path and leaned against a tree. He took a deep breath, using his left hand to steady his teetering body. "Come on." He said to himself, struggling to stand up. "Come on, man." He stood up finally, his bleery eyes fighting to keep some semblance of cohesion.

                Three men stared back at him.

                "Hello." He said with some trouble. He looked back the way he had come, then back to the three men. "Is there something wrong, guys?" He asked, his spine chilling painfully. "I mean, if I'm in your spot, I'll move." The words just seemed to make him even more afraid. The edge of the hang-over slowly disappeared as his body began to get as frightened as his mind. He glanced past the three men, but the crowd of college students was paying no attention to the distant walkway detached by the giant library and the parking lot.

                "Alan Dunston?" Asked the middle man.

                "Uh, yeah?" He rolled uncertainly out of his mouth.

 

                The crowd beyond the library went on with it's usual mid-day, between class activities. Frisbees were thrown. Drinks drunk. Food eaten. Conversations talked. All the while, everyone in the large, brick courtyard was totally oblivious to the young guitarist in the corner fighting for his life.

 

                Marilyn waited in the doorway as the class wrapped up. In the sweltering heat just outside the windows, the world waited. The students were obviously anxious, but nearly so much as their teacher. The well-aged Edgar stood at the head of the classrom, professionally hiding his disdain for the remaining few moments of the class.

                "And thus, the reason that Tolstoy continues on with this meandering of philosophical . . ." Edgar dropped his books suddenly, his shoulders slumping. "Screw it guys. Just go. Go home. I'll see you on Monday."

                The classroom cheered for less than a fourth of a minute, then the students began to quickly gather up their materials and rush out the door. Marilyn was nearly bowled over as they came running out, but she moved to the side of the door and waited. Like an early April shower, the outpour was intense initially, but almost immediately, it faded away into nothingness.

                Marilyn turned the sharp corner to come inside the room, where Edgar was gathering up his things, his overly long umbrella in the corner of the room.

                "Hey." Marilyn said, walking respetfully into the room towards the professor. “Edgar, I need to ask you a personal question.” She said, trying to get straight to the point.

                “This is an empty classroom.” The older gentleman said, motioning to the sterile room with a book in each hand. He stuffed them rather aggressively into his backpack. “If you feel comfortable here, then I’m fine with it. Alternatively, my office's on the other side of campus.”

                "Then why do you teach over here?" She asked in bewilderment.

                "Better parking." Edgar answered with a smile as he finished packing up his pack. He snapped the last quick-snap and stood up, his suit gleaming in cleanliness. "How can I help you?"

                "I, I need to ask you a question." She said, drawing an aimless design on the surface of Edgar's desk. "Um, I actually need to ask this to someone else, but I'm just, well . . ."

                "Out with it." Edgar said paternally, an amused smile on his face.

                “Have you ever thought about Ruwani and me, together?” Marilyn asked without looking up from the desk.

                Edgar blinked at her for a moment. Almost unconsciously, he glanced up at the doorway of the classroom. “You mean dating?” The older man asked, one eyebrow up as he swallowed.

                “No.” She clarified. “I mean, you know, together.”

                "Together together?"

                "Together together."

                “Oh.” Edgar said, his head rolling back with his understanding. "I see." He nodded. "Marilyn, why are you asking me?"

                "Insight into the male mind?" She offered weakly with an even weaker smile.

                Edgar sighed, chuckling a few breaths. "My wife didn't put you up to the this, did she?" Edgar asked. Marilyn shook her head. "Sydney?" He pressed? Marilyn shook her head again. "Ah." Edgar nodded. "This is purely for your own . . . 'insight'?" Marilyn nodded.

                "Okay." Edgar said, moving around the desk to stand next to Marilyn. He sat on the edge of the desk, crossing his arms as the college girl turned to watch his response. “Let me answer that question like this.” He finally said without embarrassment. “If I was to admit to that I had, I would be compromising my position as faculty.” He looked at Marilyn, a wry smile on his weathered face. "If I was to say that I hadn't, however, I would be lying."