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“If I could have my wasted days back,
Would I use them to get back on track?
Stop to warm at karmas burning,
Or look ahead, but keep on turning.
Do I have the strength,
To know how I’ll go?
Can I find it inside to deal with what I shouldn’t know?”

                                Metallica, Frantic

                When I peek back inside the building where Slate is, she’s sitting on the ground, just staring off into space. I lean inside, breathing out a sigh of relief to see that she’s dressed. As I step inside, she looks up at me. “What?” She asks with some passive aggression.

                I step down the steps cluttered with debris from the holes in the ceiling, moving slowly. I come within a few paces of her, then stop. I try to speak, but my own words just won’t come. “Can you . . .” I start. “I mean, can you remember . . .”

                She stares at me.

                I laugh. I feel awkward. I’m not really even sure why. I’m almost afraid. I hold out my hands to speak, but again the words just don’t want to come. “I, I can’t remember something.” I finally say. “And what’s worse, is that I don’t think I can even remember what it is that I don’t remember. I mean,” I stutter out, but I just give up. “Do you know what I mean?” I ask.

                Slate stares at me.

                “It’s like this.” I say, squatting down. I grab up a pebble of debris and put it down on the ground. “I’ve got this memory.” I say, pointing at the rock. “And it’s right there. But I can’t remember it. And I can’t even seem to get my mind to that point.” I say. “Do you get it? I can’t even . . . its like not only can I not remember the answer to a question, I can’t even remember the question.”

                Slate’s expression softens a bit and she thinks. She looks off for a minute, then looks back at me. “Do you even know the general topic?” She asks, surprisingly understanding.

                I stare at the rock for a moment. For some reason, that’s become the whole world, and the whole problem. “Where are we?” I ask.

                Slate draws back a bit. “We’re in the military base.” She says.

                Something in the back of my mind kicks.

                “What brought us here?” I ask, trying to feel around inside my mind. It’s like fishing through a pocket that’s full of water. It feels familiar, but strangely alien at the same time.

                “We were trying to warn them.” Slate says slowly, her head moving up and down as she speaks, as if the tempo will help jog my memory. “About Morcean.”

                “What about Morcean?” I ask. I’m getting closer.

                “He was going to invade.” She says.

                Invade an army base? That’s not it. “Morcean.” I say. I can see Slate nod out of the corner of my eye. “And, and the guy. Toren.” I exclaim, snapping my fingers. I look at Slate. “And then, then there was that big cannibal.” I say. I look off. “But . . .”

                I feel like I’m touching it, but I can’t tell what it is.

                “Morcean.” I say. “Toren. The cannibal. The zombies.” I say again. I’m closer still, but I can’t quite tell. “Where are we?” I repeat.

                “We’re in a building.” Slate offers, trying to be helpful as I pace in front of her. I walk from one side to the other of the narrow space in front of the bed that I had been strapped into. “We’re in a military base. We’re in a desert.” She says.

                The desert.

                Something about the desert.

                I turn to her. “There’s something about that desert.” I say, pointing towards the hole in the wall. “And something about Morcean and Toren and all those guys.”

                “I don’t know what there could possibly be about the desert.” Slate says. “What about the other guys?” She asks. “What about them?”

                “Something’s missing from that equation.” I say, focusing exclusively on my thoughts. “Someone.” I feel my skin go cold. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up. “Someone scary.” I say, feeling my heart rate jump. “Someone . . .”

                And for a flash, I see him. Standing tall, coat and hat and everything, he’s staring grimly at me.

                My eyes explode in light.

                Slate’s standing over me.

                “We’ve got to get out of here. Come on!” She yells.

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